My Dad and Stamps: A Rose By Any Other Name

One of the most popular inquires we receive at KNS (next to requesting the free starter-kit) is what do you call someone who collects stamps?

If this were an SNL sketch a few of the answers would be "nerd," "geek", "a member of the non-dating community", etc., etc., but truth be told children in the United States do not collect stamps as much as adults. It is the mirror opposite throughout the world where governments help promote stamp collecting and stamp supplies can actually be found in regular department stores.

While submitting these inquires the answers the emailers also provided are curious insights into their knowledge or lack thereof: "stampers", "stampsters", "stamp hobbyists", "stamp collectors", and on and on. Some folks do not really care what it is called as long as they can enjoy its entertainment value and learn a valuable historical fact along the way.

My late father was a collector for nearly 50 years and held strong opinions about the King of Hobbies in the mid-70's which is when he first noticed stamp collecting was starting to decline in America. He noticed there was less about it on the children shows. He noticed stamps were beginning to be mocked on the game shows. It was becoming more a commercial specialty rather than a commercial staple in department stores. It was become more an intellectual pursuit rather than a passionate past time.

I remember attending stamp conventions at the United Nations with my father and listening to guys who looked like insurance agents declared they were "philatelists" and were going to rescue stamp collecting from the hands of schoolchildren and well-intentioned parents. I remember my father having some choice words for these "negative nitwits" as he called them. It was moments like these that shaped my father's opinion that stamp collecting was going underground and becoming for insular and exclusive after being overtaken by more popular forces in society such as rock n roll, movies and board games.

He used to say, "if I ever find out who ruined stamps, I will fire him, after I punch him out." I always laughed because it was obvious the companies involved never invested much in marketing or advertising. They depended on the word-of-mouth and the natural cultural inclinations to support a hobby "everyone just loved." Basically they depended on habit and faith and pocketed the ad money.

But I appreciated my dad's vigor and passion for the hobby he felt was dying from within and fast becoming an egghead luxury like water polo or shooting silly birds with bazookas. I wish he was still around to see how the Hobby of Kings has made a respectable comeback with the aid of technology and another generation wanting their children to learn real knowledge for a better day beyond the limited notions of violent video games and moronic music.

Philatelist, hobbyist, stamp collector, a rose by any other name is the craft we share with our children and the world shares with us. Who could ask for more.

October: Autumn Leaves and Halloween

Autumn is my favorite season. Always has been. Always will be. It even shades my art tastes and I like the browns and oranges in paintings. Strangely, there haven't been many Halloween stamps issued throughout the world. I was only able to locate five. Maybe we should petition for more. Ha.

Growing up Halloween was my favorite holiday--more so than Thanksgiving or Christmas. I couldn't wait to get out of school and into that costume, Batman, Frankenstein's Monster, Casper the Friend Ghost, etc. I grew up in the city and selling egg insurance 1 week in advance raised the funds necessary to buy the more expensive costume I craved--plus more. Every year I would have to clean a few windows but mostly it was profitable and fun.

Now I live in the suburbs and look back at the rows of orange leaves flooding the sidewalks to my grammar school with fond memories. I miss those days but I missed more the fact that my parents were rarely able to make the Halloween trek through the neighborhood. One or both often had to work late. I was usually assigned a neighborhood parent and went trick-or-treating with their kids.

Sometimes I felt my father was doing extra stamp collecting activities, such as field trips, with me to make up for those absences. All of this is going through my mind now that I have children and Halloween is fast approaching. I'm reliving those times with them and still thinking how I can improve being the best father I can possibly be.

When they grow up I won't worry if they miss those lovely autumn leaves, I just don't want them to miss me not being around. That is the best holiday gift any father can give his children.

Building Great Memories: Parent and Child

You probably heard the old adage, "be a parent to your child; not their friend. Otherwise it becomes very confusing when time for discipline." I know firsthand this statement is very true but like anything in one's life you cannot take it to the extreme. Too much parenting causes the child to shut off communication and turns your presence into a giant rule maker and not someone who listens or cares about their concerns--real or imagined. That's where stamp collecting comes into play.

As discussed previous in "fellowship" article, the parent/child relationship is strengthened in the area of trust when dealing with stamps. The child is allowed to learn from stamps by making their own decisions about what, how and where to collect. Each stamp session or lesson is another building block of fruitful memory the child carries the rest of their lives. Some of my finest memories of my father, may God rest his soul, revolve around stamp collecting. Our trips to New York stamp shows, the United Nations, pulling out the albums on unscheduled rainy days and just pouring hours into figuring out this and that about stamps and about each other. We were building great memories. My father was still my father but I felt deep down inside he figured out a way to be my friend for a few hours and that lightened the load for both of us considering our respective roles and responsibilities.

I think I got to be the grown-up by making decisions and my father got to be the kid again and sat back and enjoyed not having to direct every facet of every thing in the universe. I' m remembering what I learned then and applying it to my sons in the present day. I will never stop being a father since that role today is more critical than ever before but I will find ways to be his friend whenever possible and whenever it doesn't compromise my primary role. Stamp collecting is going to be another highly useful vehicle to communicate for all parties involved.

Another excellent stamp approach is to take the stamp collecting from the indoors of your home and bring it on the road. We went to museums (Navajo heritage), planetariums (space stamps), zoos (exotic animal stamps), stamp shows (United Nations), conventions (NYC), etc, etc. that spot-lighted the educational angle of stamps. These trips also built great memories that made stamp collecting an exciting adventure. It brought my father and I closer and suddenly made me realize how fortunate I was when other neighborhood kids complained how little they saw of their parents. Some of those kids went on to school problems, behavior problems and eventually legal problems. Neglect, in my opinion, is a form of abuse. Stay active, stay involved and your children will probably stay out of trouble. Stamps might just do the trick.